Wednesday, October 9

The truth... about introverts.

Hey...  #Introvert

Introverts. It just sounds scary. Like a word you give to freaky, anti-social creepers, right?.. but how many of you really know what or who introverts are? Doesn't everyone just assume introverts to be home loving, slightly mental, psychos?
   If that is actually your outlook on introverts then brace yourself. This may come as a rude shock to you, but I'm about to rebuff this quelling assumption. I'll willingly admit that I am among the scarce race of people known as introverts. No, they aren't reclusive, slightly mental psychos, they are just different. They think differently, (and much more), than most people.
   When I was younger being called introverted was an insult. Why? I always thought that introverted people resided in dark caves, deep in thick pine forests as far away from other humans as they could possibly get. As I got older, and started doing a little more reading on the matter I discovered that introverts aren't as ridiculously far fetched as I once thought.. in fact, everything I read sounded exactly like me! In an attempt to diminish the increasingly frustrating ideas about what introverts are, allow me to address some of the myths and truths of introverts.

Contrary to the general outlook on introverts, they aren't as scarce as some have been led to believe -and no, they don't all hide in self dug holes deep away from sunlight and people. According to The Introvert Advantage (How To Thrive in an Extrovert World), by Marti Laney, Psy.D, about 25% of people are Introverts.They are the minority of our population but the majority of the gifted in our population.
Introverts totally superior!

Myth 1. Introverts are shy. This assumption is completely inaccurate. Introverts can be extremely social, outgoing and friendly, especially once they feel comfortable around you. Introverts prefer to watch rather than jump headlong into all the festivities, not because they are afraid of people, but because they need a reason to do so. They aren't mad, or depressed, or even anti social!  An Introvert’s preferred interaction with people is often more of listening than it is of talking. More one-to-one than speaking in large groups at the same time. An Introvert can speak to a large crowd, but when it comes to having group conversation, an Introvert is more likely to feel awkward. (1) On the surface, introversion looks a lot like shyness and though both limit social interaction, shyness and introversion are for differing reasons. "The shy want desperately to connect with others but find socializing difficult," says Bernardo J. Carducci, professor of psychology and director of the Shyness Research Institute at Indiana University Southeast. "Introverts seek time alone because they want time alone. An introvert and a shy person might be standing against the wall at a party, but the introvert prefers to be there, while the shy individual feels she has no choice."(2)


Myth 2. Introverts don't like to talk. This almost makes me laugh out loud. Introverts LOVE talking, but HATE small talk. Introverts don’t talk unless they have something to say and aren't comfortable trying to make themselves heard. They would rather just listen then have to speak something that no one appears to desperately need said. In case you didn't catch it before, they hate small talk. If you were to get an introvert talking about something they're interested in they won’t shut up for days.
   Those who actually know me are well acquainted with the fact that I love to talk. However, I'm easily annoyed by people who want to text me for hours and talk about.. NOTHING.
 "Introverts crave meaning, so party chitchat feels like sandpaper to our psyche." Diane Cameron
Myth 3. Introverts don't like people. This is perhaps the most stinging myth out there. Introverts care deeply about people. If you are lucky enough for an introvert to consider you a friend, you probably have a loyal ally for life. The way in which introverts love is deeper more personal, they treasure you. They would physically endure pain for you, if it meant you would be happy. It is true that introverts often get worn out being around people for to long, and will often subside from society for a few weeks in order to recharge and rest. A lot of the time this can be viewed negatively by an introvert's friends, however, the chances are that their sudden withdraw from humanity has absolutely nothing to do with you. Introverts need time to recuperate, to recharge so that they can give their best again.
   As an introvert, you tend to care far to much about, well, everything. People we love are only intensified in that respect.
Myth 4. Introverts don't like to be out in public, they always want to be alone. This is absolute nonsense. Introverts don't mind being out in public, but they don't like being out in public for as long as other people. It is very true that they enjoy solitude, but they don't always need to be alone. Though it is often what they crave most. Introverts seek to be alone, not to be lonely, but to spend time listening to their thoughts. "They think a lot. They daydream. They like to have problems to work on, puzzles to solve. But they can also get incredibly lonely if they don’t have anyone to share their discoveries with. They crave an authentic and sincere connection with ONE PERSON at a time." (2) Introverted minds are constantly whirling, constantly thinking, solitude is like a paradise, an oasis in their heads. Imagine for a moment that you were an introvert who had just been asked the simple question, "how are you?" More than likely, these would be the general outline of your thoughts. Well, how am I really? Am I fine? What's really going on with me. I felt okay this morning, though now I'm a little worn out. Because of that I feel a little anxious and my toes are still sore from jamming them into the wall yes- I'll stop you there before I have a chance to fill up the whole page. Introverts think about EVERYTHING. Even simple questions such as that.

 Love, extrovert / introvert definition.

Myth 5. Introverts are odd. It is true that introverts tend to be much more unique than the general population, mainly because they give themselves the ability to be themselves. They are less likely to 'follow the crowd', and more likely to develop personal interests and hobbies. However, this doesn't make them odd, it just makes them real. They don't waste time pretending to be infatuated with an idea or concept that everyone else is obsessing over. It doesn't mean they don't like things other people like, no, it just means they like things they like. Some could classify this as being 'odd', or even 'weird' -but then- who are the ones pretending?
Introvert Reality Check #1 - "We're quiet, therefore we're..." the perception and reality.
Now on to truths about introverts!

 Introvert Reality Check #2

Truth 1. Introverts can be successful. From various online searches (because the internet is always right), I came up with a list of some examples of those believed to be introverts from verbal or other leading ques, these include: J.K. Rolling, the author of Harry Potter. Abraham Lincoln. Christina Aguilera, pop star and reality TV mentor. Albert Einstein, the world-renowned physicist who developed the theory of relativity. Emma Watson, actress. Audrey Hepburn, actress. Johnny Depp, actor. The list goes on.

Truth 2. Introverts can have many strong social skills.


Truth 3. Introverts are creative, they are deep thinkers.  They don't respond as fast as normal people when faced with questions or problems because the thought processes of their minds are more complicated. The message from the brain to the mouth takes a sort of circular course, rather than direct. Whereas an extrovert has the capacity to transmit thoughts directly from their brain to their mouth.

Introverts are Awesome - Facebook
Sorry about the language, I just thought this was hilarious.

 Thinking vs. saying - introverts

Truth 4. Introverts treasure the relationships they make. As I said before, Introverts care a LOT. When they say they love you, they weren't joking. Introverts thrive on meaning. They think about things, saying something emotionally untrue would be like making light of our own souls. (unless of course they re-think the whole thing over again and come up with a different answer.)
i care  

Truth 5. Introverts aren't freaks. In fact, they blend in so well with the population that it's pretty difficult most of the time to identify an introverted individual. We think, we talk, we feel, we laugh, and we enjoy solitude.
The end.


Pictures: Pinterest

Special thanks to one of my amazing best friends Ilsa, for taking the time to edit my horrid grammar and spelling! I love you Ilsa!

1 comment :

  1. Hi Lyndsey! Your write up on introverts helps me understand both my husband and my 16 year old daughter Makayla. Do you remember playing with Makayla? You two sure got along real well... maybe because you two are so similar! I have a goal now to stop referring to Makayla as anti social when talking to other people. I will just say she's an introvert and that's okay! Great post, backed up with references too, Lyndsey!


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